She/Her Eulogy by Danny McLaren

Trigger warning: misgendering.

She/Her Eulogy

She is an old friend I do not miss,
wish I could miss but She hangs around and reminds me
that She isn’t going anywhere
soon.

She is an old wound made raw again,
scab picked, can’t heal
and most certainly can’t forget
that when they see me, they see
She.

I’m mistaken for She
every day. makes me stop and stare and
what am I wearing that says ‘She’ to you?
button down, baseball cap,
ambiguity, I thought, but others seem to think
not.

I cut my hair, number 1 buzz,
so they can’t possible see She anymore
but curves betray me, betray She
so does voice,
do hands,
lips,
chin,
chest.

my body speaks She without consent, whispers
there She is!
why, isn’t She lovely?
but She doesn’t live here anymore.

not since They settled in.

davide-ragusa-DJdkx08_4oM-unsplash

About the author

Danny McLaren is a queer, trans and non-binary writer who uses they/them pronouns. They have an interest in exploring themes related to equity, resistance, and survival in their work, and often write about their gender, sexuality, and mental health incorporating these themes. Their work has appeared in Cleaning Up Glitter Journal, ENBY Magazine, and GlitterShip Podcast and Anthology. They currently have a micro-chap with Post Ghost Press titled Sorry It’s Not better News, and are a 2019 Editor’s Pick poet in the Brain Mill Press National Poetry Month Contest. They can be found on twitter at @dannymclrn.

 

Photo by davide ragusa on Unsplash

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